Two weeks ago, we welcomed you into this world. It’s in a rough state, and that keeps me up at night - but more on that another time.
It’s only been two weeks, but we can see that you’re a curious, calm, sweet, snuggly little dude. You’re your own person, and like any sibling, you resemble your brother in a myriad of uncanny little ways.
Though you can’t possibly know it yet, you have a big brother: Jackson. We’ve been waiting for your arrival, eager to meet you, to know you, to love you.
Jackson pried open our parenting-hearts, and now that you’re here, we’re twice-pried. I have little idea of what to expect, but: I expect this means that often you’ll get twice the love - there’s certainly a large, loving community ready to welcome you. They’ve carried us these past 16 months, and many of them will carry you, too.
I also expect that there’ll be times that you have to share it: the only kid in the house, and yet sharing attention with your brother. I hope you can forgive us - and maybe someday, you can participate with us.
Though you won’t meet face-to-face, you are going to get to know him. We know him from raising him for two years. Others know him second-hand from pictures, videos, and stories. You’ll know him from a new perspective: as a sibling. I don’t know what this will be like. I imagine it’ll be normal for you, but I don’t know what that means - maybe a mix of love and longing?
Though he’s not here with us, the two of you are going to share. You’re wearing some hand-me-downs, you’ve got the same goofy dog, the same crib, many of the same bedtime stories, and, over time, many of the same friends.
When we lost your brother, it collapsed our lives. With you entering, it’s not reversing that collapse - and yet, it’s also the opposite of that collapse. We’re parents to a living child again, with those roles, responsibilities, and relationships that we so cherish. You’ve pried our hearts back open, and it’s a complete blessing. You’re snuggled up on us all day, and we’re so happy to finally have you with us.
Owen, we really don’t know what to expect from all of this. We have our guesses — and we have some mentors who’ll guide us, as we’ve guided other grieving families — but we’ve all got a lot of figuring-out to do.
Owen, here’s to figuring it out, together, day-by-day. ♥️